As we get older, we get stronger, and while people we love leave us, we eventually understand death is part of life. Imagine the wisdom and realizations a man of 94 might have.
94 wow... almost a century. He was born at the end of the Austro-Hungarian empire and lived through two World Wars. Living in Hungary when they invented the first ball point pen, he was there when the world watched the first plane fly, and alive when they invented the assembly line. He saw the Industrial Age turn into the Information Age, was one of the first to see TeleVision. What an exciting time to live and be young!
Imagine a poor farming family, with 9 children, working their land, with little education, struggling to survive. What are the odds of the youngest of that family, leaving everything he knows, escaping during a revolution to find safe haven for his own family all the way in Canada from Bakonysarkony, Hungary? I'd say it depends on how determined that man was to finding a good life for the family he waited so long to have. Traveling across the world to start again is brave. But a man of 40 is truly an adventurous soul. With two small boys in tow, with little more than the clothes on their backs, he left everything behind to find a better life, to reap the land of the free, and travel to the Americas.
Nagypapa found a better living, and maybe an easier life, but he missed Hungarian and it's rich culture. He missed the music, the flavours, and his family. He a strong Hungarian patriot to the end.
He was a dignified man, and going from a well respected train conductor position in Hungary to a hospital janitor at the Jubilee Hospital in down town Victoria, BC, he still managed to hold his head up high, dress well and supported his family. He quickly bought a house and car, the best furniture he could afford and saved his money. This immigrant did better than most people who live their whole lives in one country with loads of family support and friends behind him. But her did if alone, with no support. In fact he supported his family in Hungary until the day he died. His conservative nature, 'saving for the best' mentality was something we can all learn from. Do not live past your means, he'd say, never use credit cards, and the key to longevity is under eating, He never actually said the last one, he showed us every time he left the last bite of two on his plate. That way you never go for another plate of food. I smiled, knowing Nagymama couldn't throw away good food and would throw his last piece into her mouth! His determination got him to 94. These are the things I learned from my grandfather.
What I loved the most about my Nagypapa, is he insisted on big family gatherings when I was young. We would gather with our cousins and camp or travel, have big Christmases with whole roasted pork with the apple in it's mouth. The happiest memories I will carry through my life are with him at the head of the table, with his sons lovingly at his side, and the grandchildren all around.
Nagypapa had a beautiful life. His life like a thread connects us all. He lives through his sons, and on to his grandchildren. I see him when I look in the mirror or into my son's face. I see it in my cousin and her children and my niece too. I feel him around me, his imprint on us. His life is ours to carry forward, and he lives on. We are the fabric of his life. And when I look around I see a beautiful family he was proud of. A life worth every breath.
People tend to be so distracted in their lives, isolated to their TV's and video games, that what Nagypapa represents is almost extinct. Family values, loving one another, time together, family dinners around a big table. Those are the things I pass forward to my family. Good home cooked meals, laughing with loved ones, travelling visiting family. I am so glad I had my Nagypapa to teach me so many amazing things about life.
I love you Nagypapa, Until we meet again.
Love
Eva
